Finn At The Inn

A couple of months ago, an intern started her tenure at my workplace. A 23 year old hottie from Finland and all of the boys are ga-ga over her. I'm one of those boys. But I'm married and a good boy, so instead of flirting with her shamelessly, I went about the process of just being her friend. She'd come in looking marvelous, and I'd ask her questions about her homeland. She'd arrive looking delectable and I'd tell her anecdotes about my kids. Quickly, we have found ourselves as tight as any two people at work. The other dudes fall all over themselves to impress her, but it's me she seeks out for our daily hug. Sweet.

I was thinking about this and talking with a friend about it. Of course, I have a huge crush on the Finn. In fact, for the first month or so I could see how after four years of marriage, this was my first real recognized temptation. Although my marriage is not perfect, my commitment to fidelity is strong. Good thing. Thankfully, I am aware of the possibilities of infidelity and keep myself in check. But being the analytical sort, it's been interesting and fun to watch how I handle myself in such situations. And so, I acknowledge the crush and go about my life being good and paying attention.

Anyway, after spending a lot of time with my Finnish friend, I came to a realization about what my crush is all about. I am thirty-six years old, thirteen years older than her. As hot and lovely as she is, I think my infatuation with her has more to do with her age than anything else. It's not so much that I want to have sex with her - I just want to be twenty-three again. My memories from my early twenties are fantastic. My back never hurt for no good reason and I was in the best shape of my life despite the abundance of cigarettes and alcohol. I was seeing concerts and shows most nights and the world most certainly appeared to be my oyster. And now a twenty-three year old with that same youthful energy is giving me the time of day and I'm like an amateur sociologist, studying the social behaviors of people who are not too old to be cast on shows like MTV's The Real World.

Once I realized this, I had to laugh. It put things into perspective and I see our friendship for what it is. There are no more concerns about the possible temptations. The crush phase is over. She's still drop-dead gorgeous and the light of the workplace and I love what our continued daily hugs do to the envious twenty year old lotharios among us, but she's become more of a sister to me. I invited her over to my apartment last night to meet my family and watch American football (McDonald's and television - an All-American experience, indeed).

After I took her home, my wife said that she liked her and that she was very nice. I agreed with her and shared with her my little analysis from above. I can talk to my wife about a previous crush and receive no scorn. One of the many things I love about my wife is that I can share thoughts like that with her and not worry about ugly jealousies. She trusts me and has a very easy going way of looking at most things in life. She knows that I am more of an observer than a doer. And she knows that I'm a gentleman.

At thirty-six, I have made friends with a twenty-three year old beauty. And it's not her pants I want to get into, it's her age. Funny. Something tells me that when my midlife crisis finally hits, it'll be relatively smooth. I'll just reflect and write about it.